A Celebration of a Life Well Lived

Well I don’t think anyone much is still looking at this site anymore but I don’t really feel like it is finished.  At the same time this is very hard for me to do. Not sure why. I guess it feels sad that something else is ending too.

Mom passed away on the 30th of December at 10:38 in my living room which had been her bedroom for the last year.  When she was diagnosed last December with gall bladder cancer we weren’t given a very good prognosis so we had Mom a lot longer than we ever imagined.  There were lots of ups and downs through the year but so many precious times together which I thank God for.  Mike, Gay, Linda, Roger and all the grandkids came quite often.  She loved seeing the great grandbabies and on one occasion she even wore her hair in a whale spout when Kenzie, Carly and Reilly came over. We played countless games of Qwirkle. The last game we played was on December 4th, the night before she went back to the hospital that last time.  She said we might as well play to get her mind off how badly she was feeling.  Well, she had a great game – 12 qwirkles to my 6 – so in the end, she was the “Qwirkle Queen!”   She faithfully walked 6 laps around my house each morning with her cat Hope following along behind.  I’d put on the Alan Jackson Hymns CD that Janice got for her – we called it her marching music.  She prayed at breakfast, I prayed at lunch.  She liked to watch movies  with Sarah and I but she couldn’t get the recliner she liked to sit in to recline by herself.  Sarah always tilted her back and tucked her in with her afghan, fixed her a snack if she felt like it.  Last winter we got her hooked on watching American Idol.  She really liked Scotty McCreery, a young man who sang country and was very open about his faith in God.  The first time Mom had to go to the ER with a temperature was on American Idol night.  She was so aggravated that she had to go to the the ER and miss it. So many fun little memories. Oh how I miss her.  Funny how even though we knew it was coming and how much she needed and wanted to go in the end, it was still so hard.  It broke my heart when they came from the funeral home for her.

The next few days were busy getting everything planned, even though much of it had been done already. On the first of January, Mike’s birthday, Mike, Linda and I met with Craig to plan the service and then went to Mike’s house to go through pictures. We had talked about Mom wearing a green or lavender suit but in the end, we put her in a pink blouse.  I always thought she looked so pretty in pink.  She wore a beautiful Grandma necklace that Polly had given her.  And she had a little white Bible in her hands. The calling hours were at the church on Monday the 2nd of January.   So many beautiful flowers were sent.  At 2:00, the 9 grandkids, Mom’s 3 sisters and one of her brothers, and Linda, Roger, Mike, Gay, John and I all lined up to greet everyone.  It was such an emotional day but oh, what blessings we received from everyone that came through and shared with us how Mom had touched their lives.  Although we knew Mom helped and cared for many people, we learned a lot about her that day. “Your mom helped me through this hard time or that, I still have a note your mom sent me years ago, your mom gave me a job and trained me when I was really in need, your mom called me every week when I was going through my divorce, I never would have made it through school without your mom, your mom showed me how to care for my new baby, your mom sent me cards and cookies when I was stationed overseas”  A humble, wise, caring and loving person she was!  There were also so many who came just because they loved and cared about us, friends from our workplaces, neighborhoods, schools, churches, quilt groups.  At such a hard time, we all felt very loved and supported.  I counted almost 400 names in the guest book.  Thank you to those of you who were a part of that!

I think Mom would have enjoyed her memorial service.  We really wanted to honor Mom as well as the God that she loved.  Mom, being mom and wanting to make it easier for us, helped us plan much of the service over the last year.  She was adamant that we sing the hymn “One Day” – all five verse because it tells the whole story of the gospel.  Faith Pencil blessed us by singing “Amazing Grace.”  My cousins, Becky and Beth, so beautifully sang “In Christ Alone,” one of my favorite songs.  Another song that Mom picked was “I can only imagine” which Eric Stringer sang.  The grandchildren read Psalm 103 from Mom’s big study Bible.  One of Mom’s dear friends, Jane Wilson, spoke about Mom’s faith and friendship.  Mike, our fearless big brother, did what Linda and I, as much as we wanted to, knew we could not!  He gave a beautiful tribute to Mom.  When I get my copy of it maybe I could post it here. I just hope people don’t think less of us because we smoked the rhubarb!   Craig, the minister at First Christian had a wonderful message.  He talked about Mom’s deep love for the Lord and His Word, how she was a life long student of the Bible.  Mom deeply desired that all who came would understand where she had placed her hope.  Craig boldly told how the only way to be saved from our sinful state is to believe in the death and resurrection of Jesus Christ and accept the gift of salvation that is so freely given to all who believe.  Not one of us can ever be good enough on our own.  You may say, ‘How can God be so narrow minded to say that this is the only way to be saved?’  On the other hand, how can it be that the God of the universe loves us so much that He even made one way for us to be saved!  Why should He make anyway at all!  But He did and that was the source of Mom’s joy and peace and hope, all of her life, but especially this last year.  She had no fear in dying. She wanted that for all of her family and friends too.  Please think about this and seek out the answers to any questions you may have.  Because there is going to be one big happy reunion in heaven some day and you don’t want to miss it!  We ended the service with the song “I’ll fly away, Oh Glory.’”  That was one of Mom’s “marching songs” and I think she had been singing it all fall.

The funeral procession drove past Mom’s little house on the way to Myers Cemetery.  It was an awfully cold day. It felt so sad to leave Mom there but as Aunt Jeannie said, “She’s not here.”  Leigh Ann sang  “Precious Lord, Lead Me Home,”  another song Mom loved.  Many members of Mom’s church had worked hard to prepare and serve a wonderful meal for all of us back at the church.  It was a sweet time of fellowship and a time to let down and relax.  And that was that.  The end of a life well lived.  But Mom’s legacy of love and hope and faith will live on in all of us who have been touched by her life.  In the words of Jesus when he spoke to the woman who anointed Him with perfume before His death, words that I’m sure that Mom has heard upon arriving in heaven,  “She did what she could!’’

Some beautiful verses that Mom loved from Psalm 103

1 Praise the LORD, my soul;
all my inmost being, praise his holy name.
2 Praise the LORD, my soul,
and forget not all his benefits—
3 who forgives all your sins
and heals all your diseases,
4 who redeems your life from the pit
and crowns you with love and compassion,
5 who satisfies your desires with good things
so that your youth is renewed like the eagle’s.

8 The LORD is compassionate and gracious,
slow to anger, abounding in love.
9 He will not always accuse,
nor will he harbor his anger forever;
10 he does not treat us as our sins deserve
or repay us according to our iniquities.
11 For as high as the heavens are above the earth,
so great is his love for those who fear him;
12 as far as the east is from the west,
so far has he removed our transgressions from us.

13 As a father has compassion on his children,
so the LORD has compassion on those who fear him;
14 for he knows how we are formed,
he remembers that we are dust.
15 The life of mortals is like grass,
they flourish like a flower of the field;
16 the wind blows over it and it is gone,
and its place remembers it no more.

17 But from everlasting to everlasting
the LORD’s love is with those who fear him,
and his righteousness with their children’s children—

Thanks for reading this blog.  Always so nice to know someone cared!

Lori

The Final Plans

We met with the Funeral home this afternoon. The plans are as follows:

Calling hours are 2-4 and 6-8 on Monday, January 2nd, at First Christian Church in Springfield.

The Funeral will be at 1:00 on Tuesday, January 3rd, also at the church.

The church address is 3638 Middle Urbana Road, Springfield, 45502.

Home Sweet Home

It’s finally over for Mom.  This morning Linda and I were sitting with Mom, and Hannah was reading to her from  Ephesians chapter one.  With the promises of spiritual blessings ringing in her ears, Mom breathed her last  breath and entered the wonderful presence of our Lord Jesus Christ. Although our hearts are breaking, we are glad that this long and difficult battle is over for Mom.  We are rejoicing that she is healed and praising God for our great salvation. One day we’ll all be together again because of the hope we have in Christ.  Thank you for your prayers this week.  Check back later for specific details about the calling hours and service.  Will most likely be Monday and Tuesday.

The verses that Mom heard as she entered Jesus’ presence:

³ Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us in the heavenly realms with every spiritual blessing in Christ. ⁴ For he chose us in him before the creation of the world to be holy and blameless in his sight. In love ⁵ he predestined us for adoption to sonship  through Jesus Christ, in accordance with his pleasure and will— ⁶ to the praise of his glorious grace, which he has freely given us in the One he loves. ⁷ In him we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of sins, in accordance with the riches of God’s grace ⁸ that he lavished on us. With all wisdom and understanding, ⁹ he made known to us the mystery of his will according to his good pleasure, which he purposed in Christ, ¹⁰ to be put into effect when the times reach their fulfillment—to bring unity to all things in heaven and on earth under Christ.

Ephesians 1:3-10

Still Waiting For Jesus

Mom is hanging in there.  Pretty much sleeping all the time, not really responding much.  Sometimes she will turn her head toward us when we are talking to her.  Seems pretty comfortable with the pain meds. During the night she began having increased secretions and her breathing sounds a little raspy.  Having increased periods of apnea.  Doesn’t seem like it can be too much longer. We’ve been reading Scripture and singing hymns to her.  The Foor family is not too musically inclined so she’ll probably really be relieved when she gets to heaven and can hear some decent singing!  It’s been a long, hard week but I’ve been blessed in many ways.  All of the family has been in and out throughout the week.  Linda’s daughter, Stacy, and granddaughter, Reilly, even made it in from Germany. It’s been so great to be together through all of this. The hospice nurses have been very helpful and supportive.  We have felt the prayers of the many people we know are praying for us.  We are trusting in God’s perfect timing for Mom.

Verse for the day:

But our citizenship is in heaven. And we eagerly await a Savior from there, the Lord Jesus Christ, who, by the power that enables him to bring everything under his control, will transform our lowly bodies so that they will be like his glorious body. Philippians 3:20-21

O Come O Come Emmanuel

Hello Friends.  Hope a merry Christmas was had by all.  We’ve had a lot of family in which has been good for Mom.  Christmas Eve we read the Christmas story with Mom and sang hymns and carols to her.  She is slipping a bit more each day.  She is having more pain and getting more pain medicine.  She wakes up and knows us but is struggling to get the words out she wants to say.  It makes us so sad not to be able to understand what she is saying or what she might want us to do for her.  When we were singing with her she was mouthing the words to “Oh come all ye faithful” with us.  She is no longer able to take any food or liquids in.  The hospice nurse came in the night and put a catheter in because it was becoming quite difficult and painful for her to get up.  She has never been able to use a bedpan.  Of course only the Lord knows the time frame but the hospice nurse said she expects it may be another few days, maybe a week.  Please pray that it will be soon.

Made it home.  We got the port issues straightened out and got home about 7:00 last evening.  Mom was so glad to be home.  The hospice nurse came soon after and helped us get settled.  The pain med has been working well to keep her comfortable.  Linda spent the night and slept down in Mom’s room to help her.

She ran a fever again this morning.  Her blood pressure is a bit low. It seems she’s winding down.  She is so ready to be with Jesus (and Grandpa, she says).  She sat up and had an egg and toast earlier and enjoyed some pineapple sherbet Linda got for her.  Amy came today with Kenzie and Carly in their beautiful Christmas dresses.  Mom loved seeing all of them!  Mike has been here. The hospice nurse came again.  It’s been a busy but good day overall.

I know you are all praying that she will be comfortable.  Please pray also that we will know how to help her and comfort her.

One of Mom’s favorite verses:

Whom have I in heaven but you? And earth has nothing I desire besides you.  My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.

Psalm 73:25-26

We’re Busting Out!

But not for another hour or so.  There is a problem with drawing blood from her port so they are going to work on that before we go.  They will re access it and if that doesn’t work they will put in a medication to dissolve a clot that may be at the tip of the catheter.  Hopefully it won’t be much longer. The only advantage of staying is that Kyle comes in at 7:00:)  Everything is set up with hospice to come see her tonight and everything is ready at home.  She cried when the doctor told her she could go.  Just praying that she will be able to rest and be comfortable and enjoy Christmas at home.  Thanks for your prayers.  God is good!

A Week of Ups and Downs

We had hoped to be home by now but we are still here.  In the last post I mentioned that things were progressing slowly but soon after I posted that, Mom’s bowel function pretty much stopped.  The doctors were talking about more obstruction, NG tubes and CT scans.  That was a very LOW day.  At the same time they began changing around Mom’s pain meds.  They took her off the pain pump she had after surgery and were trying some oral meds.  She had a dose of oxycodone that really knocked her out.  She became very confused and eventually was extremely difficult to arouse.  This required a med, called narcan, that reverses the effects of narcotics.  It works with in seconds and almost immediately, Mom was awake and oriented.  Usually after this med is given, people wake up in a lot of pain but fortunately, Mom did not.  The amazing thing is that right after Mom had this drug, her colostomy began working.  It seems that it reversed the effect that the narcotics had of slowing her bowel. Praise the Lord!  This is probably more than anyone really wanted to know but it is good news!  Then the problem became to find something that will relieve the pain without shutting down the bowel and causing over sedation.  We’ve found that a fourth dose of the oxycodone relieved the pain and doesn’t make her too sleepy.  There are also a few meds that she’s taking to increase bowel motility.  Everything is working well.  She hasn’t been up much this week with all of the sedation issues and fatigue and one day she got a couple units of blood.  But today she’s been walking in the hall and sitting up.  She’s eating real food today and really enjoying it.  So good to see her eat!  She had a temp last night of 101.  Don’t know what that is about but hopefully it won’t keep us here.  Waiting to see the docs. We’re so hoping to go home today or tomorrow.

It has been a really emotional week for me, so up and down.  One of the “ups” was a visit from my quilting group, the Pinpricks, who came Christmas caroling last evening.  They brought a lovely basket of clear liquids for Mom and chocolate for me. Really encouraged me.  Late last night, Mom was awake and comfortable, just couldn’t sleep.  I sat by her and held her hand and we had the most precious conversation.  We talked about different things that had happened  over the last year, things she wanted me and my kids to know, thanking me for taking care of her.  She still has her sense of humor.  She wants to go home and give John a big kiss and tell him to thank all of his (doctor) friends for taking care of her.  She also wants to take Kyle home with her.  He is a nurse who has taken care of her at night all week who is so sweet and compassionate.  That’s what she wants for Christmas, she says.  She also said this week that she is going to tell Jesus what good kids we are.  Can’t hurt to have her put in a good word with Jesus for Mike and Linda and  me!  She is so amazing, always thinking of others and how all of this is affecting everyone else.  What a blessing she is – but you all knew that already!

Pray that everything comes together for us to get home soon.  We’ll keep you posted…

Progress is Slow

Things are progressing – but not as fast as we’d like.   Over the weekend Mom had problems with a lot of confusion, possibly due to the pain meds, a low sodium level, a med to help her sleep, lack of uninterrupted sleep, lingering effects of anesthesia or who knows what else.  She wasn’t able to get up much.  Last evening she started doing better, seemed more like herself.  She’s doing well today.  She took a good walk in the hall and has sat up in the chair three times already.  We even opened a few more birthday cards.  She’s eating small amounts at each meal.  Her colostomy is beginning to work but isn’t quite where it should be for her to go home. That may be the thing keeping us here a few more days so please pray that her bowel function will improve quickly.  She so wants to be home for Christmas.

Sitting here with Mom at the hospital.  She just finished her second walk of the day and we opened a few more birthday cards.  She received around 110 birthday cards!  She was so pleased and moved that so many sent her a card.  Thank you all.  She will enjoy opening them over the next few days.  All things considered, I think Mom had an ok birthday.  She received some beautiful flowers and a singing dog and enjoyed short visits from some of the family.  The best thing about the day was that the nasogastric tube was removed!  It was really causing her throat and ear to be sore.  Her bowel function is beginning to return so she is now on a full liquid diet and very happy about having cream of wheat for lunch. She is still having some pain but it is pretty well controlled with the pain meds, although the meds are causing a little confusion. It all takes time.  It is our hope and prayer that having the surgery will, once she heals, allow her to enjoy eating and  make her more comfortable  for all the days she has left with us.  She is progressing as expected following the surgery and the plan is for her to go home Monday or Tuesday. We are looking into hospice to help us when we go.  She is really looking forward to being home for Christmas, as we all are. Please pray that she will continue to recover and that all the details will be worked out for her to get home.

Lori and Mom with all of the birthday cards

Sarah, Lori, Mom, Hannah and Benj later in the day. Notice that the NG tube is gone. Yea!